This day is one to be made love - its skin is so warm. Blueberry bell clusters chime with fragrance. Bumblebees are going mad with choice. Ferns spiral upwards in undulating stillness. Finches echo springtime's wonderment in song. Mud, moss, mayflowers, and violets; the sky a cloudless celebration of blue. The whole day heaves in a quiet kind of heat. To think I'd almost stayed inside to work at making something worthy; to earn what was already given; to praise what was already praised.
Sitting at my computer, I have a little wren visit me on the window ledge outside with a small cluster of leaves. Yes, he is nest building, preparing for the days and months to come. A small yet pertinent reminder to me right in front of my eyes which cannot be ignored. I love such synchronicities.
Opening the window now I hear birds calling across the green in the sunshine welcoming the afternoon and happy that the cherry tree standing here is budding with fresh new leaf. I think of all the new opportunities which wait beyond us waiting for our notice. A stillness hangs in the air and the softness of the day with the pink and white blossoms of an English village spring caress my mind overworked from too much time at the computer today. I have to step outside to fall into the embrace which welcomes and feel the ground supporting me.
Yesterday I wandered through the elegant array of bluebells in the wood, watched rabbits dart and bird flit beneath branches as sunlight filtered through after a shower feeling the cool breeze on my cheek.
How is it that we can ignore the messages, overlook the beauty that surrounds us? It was during a particularly stressful and traumatic time that I felt impelled to immerse myself in the warm hug of nature, to become enraptured by her enticing colours, textures and smells to release myself. I found trees to hug and felt the response sending shivers of delight along my veins.
No matter where you live there is some small piece of nature to enjoy. A window box with splendid colour, a vase of flowers beaming at you and filling your soul with joy when you decide to look and truly appreciate.
I love to wander down to the river and watch the ducks playing, diving for food and truly enjoying life. A true blessing to observe and it lifts the vibrations, the mood and makes one feel so good. Another place I love to go is to walk by the sea wandering along the shore looking for interesting pebbles, shells or seaweed and I find myself in the moment and all cares vanish. Taking my shoes off I then paddle in the cool water and am completely uplifted as the breeze strokes my face and the waves wash around my ankles. Nothing matters except the now. What a luxury and so healing. It was nature which had a hand in creating wellness when I was very ill some years ago. I give thanks for nature and her wonderful ways. Enjoy your time in nature and notice how you feel so much better.
Rosemary has been writing for many years, was the Creator of Binka, the children’s television series and has had many poems in anthologies. She has read at poetry events in her home country of UK, where she studied amongst other things beyond English at college, Creative Writing, Writing for Children, Children’s Fiction, Picture Book, Short Story Writing and has written a column in a local newspaper as well as theatre crits and articles. Currently she writes on line with women’s groups and takes writing workshops as part of her Creative Empowerment series to help people to open and to create from the heart.
In addition she has created A Book For Now and Another Book For Now which have different spiritual sayings in them and include some of her own artwork. A few of her other Self Help books are Fraught With Thought, The Magic of Life, Conscious Wellbeing and Look, Live, Survive and a Book Of Children Now.
Rosemary loves nature, lives in a beautiful environment and is passionate about the sea. Photography and Art are part of her toolbox and she is aware of the ‘soul touch’ of any who will come into contact with her work. She strongly believes in the healing power of nature and loves to walk in the countryside and in the woods surrounding her home not far from London.
At times she is wrathful, red scalding lava spewing from her mouth as she splits the ground with rage. Sometimes she is joyful, her immense green lap holding the smiles of lovers, children, and daisies. At other times she is silent, dressed in white robes of contemplation, or sensual and seductive with pink blossoms strung into her wild, leafy hair.
Why then do we as women apologize for our feelings? We allow male partners, even other women to place invisible signs in front of our homes and work places that read Beware of Woman when we are PMSing, pregnant, undergoing menopause, or in one of our many ‘moods’. One of our greatest gifts is our ability to embody the wide spectrum of human emotions and wear the colors with flair.
Perhaps this is only possible when we allow the emotions to be present with kindness, understanding, and forgiveness, and without shame or judgment. It took me six years to greet the messy feelings born with my daughter as angels instead of demons. With anger, fear, sadness, and shame as my constant companions during the postpartum period, I felt like an ugly caterpillar begging for the chrysalis stage so I could quickly transform into a beautiful butterfly. I couldn’t see that the road to heaven is sometimes paved with perceived pebble stones from hell.
Today, I still feel anger, fear, sadness, and shame. Sometimes the flashbacks from the postpartum period and my childhood are so strong, that I believe I am the ugly caterpillar destined to always be abandoned.
fear
wraps itself around me
in layers of warm escape
no room to move, to respond
to the wind's howling anger
or the earth's dampened spirit
under the weight of cloudy skies
and colorless rain
this coat constricts breathing
separates me
from all other beings
frozen in their own thoughts
encased by their own egos
the same wind asks,
"why wait till spring
to become a butterfly?"
Then I remember Mother Nature never apologizes for her feelings. Why then, should I?
Kaveri has been on a quest to find answers, not through religious texts, any particular person or popular dogma,but through her own experiences. She lives with her wonderful family in northern California where she practices medicine, meditation, parenting, yoga, writing, and patience. Kaveri's column here focuses on "Living Poetry." Her first book of poetry, An Invitation, is available on Amazon. She can be reached at: aninvitationpoetry@gmail.com
Mothering in the Moment: Lessons on Mothering Learned from Mother Nature
by Jennifer Niedzielski
Mother Nature’s Life Lessons
As mothers, we have a profound teacher on the art of mothering available to us at all times. That teacher is Mother Nature. She has so much to teach us if we are ready and willing to listen. There is one lesson she has been waiting for me to learn for a very long time-- the Law of Least Effort. Now that I am a mother, it’s become essential that I learn it!
The Law of Least Effort is one of the Seven Spiritual Laws of Success by Deepak Chopra. “Do less and accomplish more,” is its mantra. Now, I've just got to say, this is so not intuitive to me. I am (err-- was) the type of person who believes that struggle, stress, and strain are essential for doing anything of importance well. Thus, I pursed mothering with the same rigor I did everything else in life; I was hard on myself, demanded perfection, worked tirelessly without breaks, and sought control of every situation.
But my theory wasn’t effective in mothering (nor in life, I’m finally able to see). The harder I pushed myself in my mothering, the harder it pushed right back. I was constantly overwhelmed and stressed. I was anxious. I fell prey to perfectionist thinking. I was angry, tired, and reactive-- all the time! That’s when I started to realize that stress, strain, and working really, really hard to be successful was actually counter-productive. Perhaps there was something to the idea of doing less to accomplish more. What did I have to lose in testing it out?
The Effortless Ease of Mother Nature
The Law of Least Effort reminds us that Mother Nature’s intelligence functions with effortless ease and grace. There is no resistance. “Grass doesn’t try to grow, it just grows…Flowers don’t try to bloom, they bloom…Birds don’t try to fly, they fly” (Chopra). In essence, the Law of Least Effort is all about just “being.” It’s all about letting go, accepting the present moment, and not thinking so darn much.
To really grasp this concept of doing less, consider how a flower grows. It doesn’t stress or strain in order to “accomplish” its true nature and beauty. It simply does exactly what it is destined to do without expending any more effort or energy than absolutely necessary. It doesn’t think, “I wonder if I’m doing this right. Am I growing fast enough? Am I as pretty as the other flowers around me? Perhaps I should try to be tulip and not a rose. I really got to get going here. I better hurry up!”
Silly example, I know. But when I consider how everything in nature displays this effortless ease and grace (sans thought), I begin to realize just how much our thinking is our primary problem. As I see it, struggle, strife, and stress all come into play as a result of our “extra” thoughts about the thing we are doing, not the doing of the thing itself. Yes, we are intelligent human beings blessed with the ability to think, but we are also infinitely intelligent human beings blessed with the ability to control our thinking so to access the sacred space of non-thinking whenever we wish.
Mindful Mothering
The principle of the Law of Least Effort and doing less to accomplish more might not initially seem realistic in mothering. More times than not, we feel we have to expend as much effort as possible to accomplish the countless things that must be done every single day. There is no denying that mothering is, at times, chaotic, challenging, and all-consuming.
But what would happen if we thought “less” in these moments? What would happen if we didn’t mentally judge these moments as stressful, bad, boring, or unacceptable? What would happen if we intentionally breathed in and out in the situations that stressed us out and focused our attention on our breath and not on our negative thoughts?
I know what happens. I’ve experienced it. I mother from a sacred place. Every time I surrender to all the mothering moments in my life by releasing my judgment of them (e.g., doing less thinking), I accomplish peace of mind. When I accomplish peace of mind, I tap into my infinite font of pure love. When I mother from this place, I respond to my children and all my mothering moments with effortless grace and ease-- just like Mother Nature intended.
Jennifer Niedzielski is a teacher, writer, mother of three young daughters, and the co-founder of Mindful Moms Network™. After teaching in the traditional classroom setting for over 12 years, she is transcending classroom walls to inspire and teach women how to reclaim their calm and take exquisite care of their mind, body, and inner-selves amidst the chaos of mothering. Through Mindful Moms, it is her intention to create a nurturing and supportive community for moms that encourages Inward Development through the Art of Mothering.
Grow and Glow with Conscious Intention Healing through Meditation
Part II
by Cindy Hively
Conscious Intention Meditation teachings and practices guide you to experience the place of true inner peace where the 'story' and distractions of life fall away leaving you with a life of wholesome health and happiness.
Conscious Intention Meditation is a simple and authentic self-empowerment and healing system that only requires your presence, intention and passion. It does not require any prior qualifications in energy medicine, meditation or spiritual philosophies. It is a modern and advanced system used by people such as Reiki masters, yoga teachers, psychologists, energy healers, social workers, accountants, school teachers, university students, musicians, parents , workers and people of all cultures and ages. It is one of the most evolved systems used in the developmental education of enlightenment since 2010, yet is as ancient as the first moment of creation itself. I would say the healing through CIM is on fire and the word is out and being taken seriously. More and more are paying attention, especially in the field of Mental Wellness because of the over whelming scientific evidence that conscious intention medicine factually works. This is great news for those of us who suffer from chronic illness/any illness, and especially brain disorders.
Traditionally in Western culture, we have sought relief from stress, anxiety and depression through medicine, alcohol or drugs. Now, in today’s modern world and the joining together of world cultures through technology and media, we can enjoy sharing and exploring scientifically researched and proven practices such as meditation to enhance the well-being of our lives naturally and authentically. This system of meditation is easy and simple and requires less and less effort the deeper you go into the process of letting go. Can you feel relief and a sense of empowerment knowing this? I am using this practice everyday and jumping for joy. Inside of our own being we actually have the power to heal ourself, feel as well as possible, and the medical field is getting it! That is truly a cause for celebration ...
Thoughts are the cause of all human suffering. Our thoughts are constantly comparing, searching, seeking, judging, organizing, controlling, manipulating and questioning life. Who Am I? Why me? How do I look? Why do others act as they do? Why am I happy? Sad? Lonely? Depressed? Why is there anger? Blame? Criticism and war? Where do I find peace in my life? Is it in my relationship, money, work, my home or my car? The list goes on. The mind is always “doing’ something or getting ready to take action in order to survive, keep safe, or feel loved.
Thoughts from the past constantly replay themselves from our subconscious mind. For example, fear of abandonment, need for approval, unworthiness and failure are patterns that repeat themselves throughout life—in relationship with ourselves, others, and community. These thoughts sometimes force us into feelings of confusion and depression.
We define ourselves and who we believe we are through family, media, religion, spirituality and society. Our natural state of being is stillness, peace and silence. It is as pure and innocent as it was the moment you where born. From birth you have been conditioned, controlled, manipulated and encouraged to believe you are different than this natural state. The need for safety, wisdom and education is an important part of human existence but we spend so much time working on survival that we have forgotten to give ourselves time to stay in touch with our authentic self.
Peace is always will be present. Silently sitting behind the activity of the mind like an ocean that calmly abides, it watches the waves arising before itself, and from itself, but not separate from its own essence. Meditation helps control the waves of thought that crash endlessly against all resistance to peace. Meditation is an authentic contemporary approach to spiritual practice and inquiry designed to bring about a total transformation of humanity. Conscious Intention Meditation creates equilibrium of the mind.
One of the most common misconceptions people have about learning how to meditate is that it involves trying to stop your thoughts or attempting to control or change the mind in some way. For this reason, many people see it as something difficult to do. In truth, true meditation is completely effortless. In fact, trying to stop your thoughts is an impossible task. The mind's job is to produce a constant stream of thoughts and we actually have zero control over the content or the frequency of the thoughts. The average adult has around 100,000 thoughts per day, 95% of which are the same as yesterday! No wonder we find so little peace. Giving the monkey mind our attention all day is absolutely exhausting! One of the most significant benefits of learning how to meditate is that it frees up a tremendous amount of energy. CIM is the philosophy and the technique which helps direct the 'Conscious Mind' to create a new perception of itself by dismantling old patterns, habits and addictive thoughts. These patterns of beliefs are what creates the obstacles to happiness in our lives. (Source: Robyn Collins, Coordinator, Conscious Life Teachings. www.consciouslifemeditation.com)
CIM creates new neural pathways within the brain. This can lead to improved concentration, a feeling of true contentment and peace, increased productivity levels and sensation of fulfillment, joy and happiness. This meditation process also allows for previous life difficulties to be brought unto a place where you are able to consciously with intention heal from past experiences.
Why Meditate?
Stress, pressure, fatigue, poor diet, alcohol, and drugs damage neural connections between the brain’s prefrontal cortex—or “CEO”—and the rest of the brain. When you are overtired or under intense mental or physical stress, the brain bypasses its higher, more evolved, rational frontal executive circuits—it starts using more primitive stimulus/response pathways. Consequently, you respond to daily demands without thinking; you make impulsive, short-sighted decisions. When the CEO goes offline, strong emotions, such as fear and anger, take over, adversely coloring your view of the world.
Stress signs
Rigid thinking
Impulsive, reactive behavior
Shortsighted decision-making
Poor working memory
Distracted attention
Drug and alcohol abuse
Unethical thinking and behavior
Stressed physiology
Fatigue
High blood pressure
Eating and sleeping disorders
Weak immune system
Imbalanced emotions
Low self-esteem and self-confidence
Worries, anxieties, and fears
Shallow, divisive emotions
Unstable relationships
Depression
People who practice Conscious Intention Meditation have reported improvements in various areas of their lives.
Here are some of them:
Greater happiness
Inner Peace
Natural Spiritual connection
More mental clarity and creativity
Feeling less stressed
Improved sleep patterns
A more relaxed way of handling difficult situations
Improved energy levels
Greater self-confidence
A deeper understanding of life
Purposeful, flexible thinking
No impulsive, proactive behavior
Greater work focus & productivity
Farsighted decision-making
Excellent working memory
Settled, focused attention
No substance abuse or addictions
Ethical thinking and behavior
Energy and vitality
Fit cardiovascular system
Strong immune functioning
Self-confidence and secure self-esteem
Feelings of safety and peace
Compassion and empathy for others
Healthy interpersonal relations
Happiness and optimism
Practice is preparation. Without practice the human being is unprepared to meet the demands of life. Practice is, at its center, engagement. When you practice, you engage the various faculties that the chosen activity requires. The more you engage, the more prepared you become. When you took your first steps in life and began walking you most likely balanced tentatively, teetered and fell. Often. But with practice, as you engaged the activity of walking over and over, you became increasingly more competent, more proficient and ultimately more elegant to move about in the world and meet the demands of your life.
Without practice you often find yourself lacking the competence needed to meet the multifaceted challenges of life. Fail to engage in disciplining your mental focus and you are likely to find yourself in repeated dis-stress instead of focusing on real strategic priorities. Fail to practice attuning to your child and you are likely to find yourself unprepared in being able to connect with them as they grow. The practice of CIM is no different.
Without the repeated engagement of practice you are largely unprepared to meet the demands of your life. It is simple, practice is a necessity. But what happens when you engage life and acquire a certain level of competency that is satisfactory for you? To answer this question we must look more closely into what it means to engage.
Engagement is the conscious inhabitation of your body and mind. Practice is happening when your open awareness is moving with, in and through your embodied activity. Dedicating to practice is your conscious participation with your life. Engagement is the conduction of your free and open awareness through your activities, whatever they may be.
When you acquire a certain level of competence that is presumed to be working well, practice typically stops. As soon as ‘good enough,’ is achieved something subtle yet extremely powerful happens: habituation steps in. One of your habituation’s central attachments is comfort. Wherever you are comfortable, wherever ‘good enough’ is subjectively perceived, your habituation will invest vast amounts of resources to maintain this comfortable status quo. One way your ego achieves this is to stop practicing. Shoeing away the ego and continued practice of CIM will continue to cultivate your life in ways that keep you centered and grounded.
This inspired desire to cultivate equanimity for yourself, the inner imposition to develop and evolve your gifts, skills and unique capacities is nothing other than your Divine be-ing calling you forth into your greatest possibilities. Your desire to go beyond habituation, to reach into novelty and to liberate the constraints of your life is the beating heart of your true strength. When you free yourself from the ego’s grip upon comfort, I think you will find yourself realizing a necessity once again. If you are to actually face and embody the purpose of your life you need your strength. Without practice strength and cultivation rarely manifest. Ultimately, practice is part necessity and part inspiration. To understand and embody practice requires both.
“True fulfillment, peace and happiness can be found in the silence of the mind. Suffering is caused through the identification and definition of the body, the world and the question: who am I? Freedom is attained through transcendence. Conscious Intention Meditation is about welcoming the miracle, freedom and peace, found only in stillness”. ~Author Unknown
Wind rocks the pine tree while ravens lift and settle lift and settle on the branches saying and saying.
The size of them, the heft the sheen the meat of them as they lift and settle lift and settle saying, saying, saying.
The sky has that dark gleam of more rain to come it’s cold.
Wind in the pine tree branches: that sound and how the tree moves.
Those ravens: rearranging off and on saying, saying-- Suddenly they lift, tilt, veer: the light on those wings their heft, their sheen, their silence gone
The pine still moving as if breathing.
Photo Credit: Shiro Kasamatsu - Pine Tree in Rain, Kinokunizaka, in Tokyo
Janine Acevedo is filled with awe by the beauty in every day moments and can't help but write about them. She lives with her husband, daughter and dog in northern California. Being diagnosed with a chronic illness has made her slow down, and in doing do, she finds more and more at which to marvel.
It is our pleasure at Buddha Chick Life to welcome an inspiring naturalist and the author/illustrator of a delightful new children's book that encourages young ones to connect with and celebrate nature. She also invites us, as adults, to re-examine our relationship with nature. She shares ways that we can find delight in our natural surroundings in wonderful new ways. Welcome, Marghanita!
1. What led you to the writing of your book, Orange Moon - Grandmother Tree?
We all have a story to tell. Each one of us is a story teller. People weave in and out of our lives at different times for different reasons, each one gifting their stories as we share our journey with them. Some leaving footprints on our heats. One such person had many stories to share, gifting wisdom, knowledge and helping me find enlightenment. During my awakening, rebirth, I was gifted Orange Moon. It was on a beautiful summers day in this dear friend's enchanted garden when Orange Moon appeared, as if by magic dancing amongst the wildflowers. A vision so beautiful, so pure only the gods could gift. I believe Orange Moon was gifted to me to help return our children to Mother Earth.
2. What is the main message of this book? What do you hope the reader will gain from reading it?
The main message I would hope that readers take from the book is how infinitely connected we are to one another and everything in our world. And that connection carries on even after death. My hope is that the parents and children who read the Orange Moon book series will catch a glimpse of the awe and wonder of our beautiful and enchanting Mother Earth, hopefully inspiring the reader to spend more time outdoors in the natural world, connecting to the oneness and reaping all the benefits time spent in nature gifts us.
3. You are also the illustrator. Tell us about that and what inspires/influences your drawing?
Mother Nature is my teacher, my healer, my inspiration. My surroundings and the beautiful people that journey in and out of my life have a great influence on my art too. Being very sensitive, I feel others joys and sorrows deep within my heart. The love that is abundantly felt burns deep, pure and true, gifting immense joy. This joy flows through me, melting into liquid, transforming into the very ink with which I write and draw. Orange Moon is my way of communicating with others, gifting and sharing the love and passion I feel for life and Mother Earth.
4. What do you perceive is the relationship between connecting with nature and spiritual growth? For healing?
Nature is the gateway to all spiritual growth. We are nature, there is no separation. In order for us to be healthy, well balanced beings we need to spend time in nature. The more disconnected we are from nature, the more lost and ill we become. Nature is our teacher and healer, our life force. When we take time to listen deeply with our hearts, with kindness and curiosity, we are able to allow Mother Nature to heal us. When I enter the forest I feel I have returned home, a place I feel safe and loved. When our hearts are fully open, we can feel that deep connection with Mother Earth. Without nature we are nothing.
5. Tell us more about the work you do with children connecting them with nature.
When children and nature mix, something magical happens. I am passionate about changing the way children spend their time by reconnecting them with nature and reawakening the awe and wonder in those of us who have become lost. I run nature classes for children (and adults) - celebrating the pure and simple power of life. We provide a natural space where children can run, play, dance, sing, squeal, shout or be silent in this forest space. They stand, kneel or crouch to paint or create the creatures, birds, trees, flowers and grasses which are all around us. We are in a space where we are surrounded by the magic of nature. The sessions flow from what happens around us each day. We are all totally absorbed in the present moment. All of this evokes joy, sparks imagination and laughter, peace, wonder, awe, love, contentment and enthusiasm. We then harness this energy and flow into foraging, hunting and collecting seeds, berries, pebbles, stones, leaves, petals, twigs, flowers and branches which, over the different sessions and seasons, we then use to create (by painting, weaving, threading, gluing) owls, squirrels, butterflies, snakes, bees, fish, turtles, flowers, frogs, bats, dragonflies and spiders, and bows and arrows. I feel honored and blessed to have been chosen to help return our children to Mother Earth.
6. How can each of us connect more deeply with nature, even as adults?
Each new day is a gift. A miracle to be celebrated. Simply by taking time to be in nature, we honor her and ourselves. A deeper connection can be easily achieved by silencing the mind, and being in the moment. Unplug and step outside the office or your home and allow the sun beams to kiss your face, let the sweet bird song soften your heart, let the sprinkling of soft raindrops wash away all your worries allowing your spirit to dance. Grabbing just 10 minutes of your day to feel that peace, that connectedness, that love, is spiritually quenching.
Thank you, Marghanita! What a beautiful mission you have created. May many beings benefit from your generous heart and earth-loving efforts!
You may enjoy this stunning video featuring Marghanita and her work.
Marghanita Hughes is a children’s author and illustrator and creator of the award-winning children’s brand: The Little Humbugs and the Orange Moon book series. She is truly able to spark a child’s sense of wonder. Marghanita is a naturalist and founder of the “Let’s Go Outside” Revolution – a non-profit organization with a mission to change the way children spend their time. Throughout the year, Marghanita runs nature classes for children and interactive workshops for educators wanting to learn how they can connect children with the natural world. She strongly believes that all children should be given the opportunity to discover and explore the natural world.
An Interview with Author and Therapist, Karuna Cayton
The Misleading Mind: How We Create Our Own Problems and How Buddhist Psychology Can Help Us Solve Them
Released by New World Library, 2012
I'm thoroughly enjoying this new "self-help" book by psychotherapist, Karuna Cayton. The title alone drew me in. What? We create our own problems? Of course we do, maintains the author, and he tells us why and how we can stop this debilitating cycle. We do it by getting to know our own mind thoroughly and by making new, wise choices (responses, not reactions) to people and life situations, as you'll hear him explain in this insightful interview.
In my own reading ofThe Misleading Mind,the pages are becoming heavily marked with yellow highlighter. I am applying what Karuna teaches (well, at least trying) and finding that his humor and boundless compassion invite me into personal investigation of some of the more "treacherous" places within my mind. I highly recommend this book to anyone (especially non-Buddhists) who wants to experience greater peace of mind and ease in their life. The tools and meditations the author presents are invaluable, practical, and truly invitational. The Misleading Mind spells relief and I am very grateful to now have this book in my self-growth library.
Leave a comment after the Interview and you'll be entered into a Giveaway Drawing to win this wonderful new book, courtesy of the publisher, New World Library.
Karuna Cayton, psychotherapist and author of The Misleading Mind,spent twelve years working with Tibetan refugees in Nepal and studying with Buddhist masters. His Karuna Group practice applies Buddhist psychology to individual and organizational clients. He lives in Northern California. Visit him online at www.thekarunagroup.com.
The ideas in The Misleading Mind are rooted in Buddhism. In order to reap their benefits, do your readers need to become practicing Buddhists? Will those with no real understanding of Buddhism be able to adopt your techniques?
The whole mission of this book, one could say my own life mission, is to be able to communicate the profound and useful ideas of Buddhist thought for any person in any walk of life. This mission is rooted in the idea that Buddhism is a system of thought and ideas rather than a religion or dogma. Albeit, religions and dogmas have been created from Buddhist ideas but I think Buddhism is more science and philosophy than religion. So, do people have to become “practicing Buddhists” to benefit from the ideas in this book? The answer is “yes and no”. They do not have to become “Buddhists” to benefit from these ideas but they do need to practice training their mind if they want to experience a positive difference in their mental health.
What are the similarities between modern psychology and Buddhism? What are the differences?
Well, this is a very big question. Simply, the similarities are with the intent of both seek to understand the mind and how it functions. Both propose a model of pathology or mental dis-ease. But they differ in their deeper explanation of the mind and they differ in their approach to long-term mental health. In handling short term mental and relationship issues they also differ since Buddhism, in some ways, has less concern on the short term, crisis management approach. Finally, in modern day psychology the primary mode of therapy has been talk therapy. This is presently evolving but Buddhist therapy is less concerned with talking and more concerned with training the mind primarily, but not exclusively through contemplative techniques.
I think it is useful to point out that modern psychology is much more suited to handling severe mental disorders such as psychotic disorders, severe substance abuse disorders, and most disorders where a person’s actual mental functioning is impaired. Lama Yeshe once commented to me, when advising that a particular student needed a psychiatric intervention, that Buddhism was for “healthy people”. I do not think he meant merely the “worried well” but he did indicate that one needs a certain degree of ego strength and grounding.
Finally, and perhaps most importantly, Buddhist therapy and psychology has been tested for over 2500 years with thousands, millions perhaps, of success stories. It was created and developed by highly accomplished practitioners. It is not the latest craze. I’m sorry to say that modern psychology is hardly even formulated, it is not a uniform system of thought, and it is in its infancy. We are doing something very, very serious here by playing with people’s minds, people’s lives. So we should approach both Buddhist and modern psychology with caution.
You say that your book creates a gradual process of becoming happier, but isn’t everyone looking for a quick fix?
Yep. That’s the problem. This is another indication that we are in the nature of suffering. If our condition were not so intolerable, why would we need a quick fix? Quick fixes lead to quick breakdowns. They are not enduring. I understand that we need some quick relief sometimes. If we have a brain tumor we may need to take painkillers in order to just endure. But everyone would be aware that painkillers are not going to get rid of the tumor. I have to admit that I’m taking kind of the brutal approach of focusing on long-term solutions. As a result, short-term remedies like comfort and Band-Aids might not get much attention. The short-term problem just fades away anyway. But many of the techniques presented in the book can work on the short-term solution as well as the long term.
You say that it is important for us to befriend our problems. What does that mean and what does that look like?
I was quite sensitive and concerned when presenting that idea. Really, I would say that we need to befriend ourselves. Perhaps a clearer statement would be that we need to be in relationship with our problems. It’s like this: let’s say you have an unruly teenager living in your home. In fact, he is your own child. He is family. This is often similar to the problems that arise from our disturbing emotions such as anxiety, fear, irritation, and disappointment. In counseling teenagers and families I have found that the problem that exists between them is impossible to resolve if they don’t have some kind of relationship where they can talk and dialogue about the situation. So, first is to be able to build or rebuild this rapport between the parties. Then, communication begins and I have found when all the parties can begin to understand the other person’s experience and reality they can begin to create shared solutions. It works. Then, what can and does happen is the parties become “friends” or “allies” working against the problem together. This not some kind of wishful thinking. It happens.
And, likewise, we need to develop a kind of relationship with our afflictive emotions, engage with them, and learn from them. When we open up to our mind and all of its functions as a curious student, we become better and healthier. In that way, the mind helps us and it is as if we are friends.
One final point to this question. I think, in general, we are not friends with ourselves. When we notice a flaw or aspect of ourselves we do not like we often generate a kind of self-hate or self-dislike. I do not believe we should necessarily “love” our faults but we must rein in the kind of “emotional violence” we may inflict upon ourselves when our best qualities are not coming out.
You say that life means suffering. How so?
Well, we have to get very clear on our terms. I don’t really think the word “suffering” is particularly an accurate synonym for what the Buddha taught. Of course, he did not teach in English. The idea of suffering has a few different levels of understanding but the easiest way to understand what is meant by the term is that we are never satisfied. We are always on a kind of seesaw of up and down. We are not in control of our own destiny. A simple example is that you may decide, “I am going to be happy today no matter what,” and yet, we don’t really have control over whether or not we can make it through a whole day being happy. Anything can happen, will happen, and we will lose our balance and joy. I doubt that most of us can make it even through a whole day. What does that say about our life? That we cannot just decide and will our way to a whole day or two of happiness, security, being problem-free, let alone a whole lifetime. This is what is meant by suffering – having no real control over our destiny, our mood, our wellbeing. However, we do have the potential to have control. We just haven’t figured out how to access this potential. Anyway, this idea of suffering is huge and I can go on and on.
What is the primary cause of suffering in our lives and what can we do about it?
The primary cause of suffering is confusion. That’s all. From confusion all problems arise. What are we confused about? The way things really exist. That includes the nature of our own personal identity and the nature of how things themselves exist. Why does this matter? Well, it is like in a dream. If you are being chased by a group of thugs who want to harm you if you knew it was just a dream you would not be afraid. Or maybe a better example is the work of an illusionist like David Copperfield or David Blaine. When you know it’s just a trick you don’t worry that the actual Statute of Liberty has disappeared! So, things happen as problems because we see things existing differently than they are and then, due to habit, we respond.
What we can do about this situation is slowly train the mind to see things as they are. Then our habitual reactions will slowly cease and we will respond in an authentic manner that will be uncharged with all the emotional garbage we engage in at the present time. We’ll be quite relaxed and satisfied.
You say that enthusiasm is one of the most important positive emotions to cultivate in our lives. Why?
Without enthusiasm we get so heavy, too serious and too self-conscious. The opposite of enthusiasm is probably boredom. As modern people with a conditioning of stimulation we are very prone to being entertained and thus, when not entertained we become bored. Enthusiasm seems to arise from a vision, a mission. In business when the vision wanes or is not communicated well to the rest of the people then work becomes mundane. Training our mind, while at times of course can be a bit mundane, should not be mundane or boring the majority of the time. By having a vision of our own mental health and how we can positively impact others then we will maintain an enthusiasm that is infectious to others. That alone can change the world and, enthusiasm is a positive state of mind, a positive emotion. So it is healthy.
What advice would you offer to individuals who are dealing with challenging emotions like anger and rage?
You have a choice. First you really need to see that anger is destructive of everything you want from the anger in the first place. It’s toxic and poisons your own wellbeing and those around you. So, the first thing is to see that. The second thing is to know you have a choice. While it is not easy to make a choice when we see that being under the control of the destructive emotions is like being a prisoner of our own mind then it is just a logical thing to make a stand against anger, against loss of control, and begin, slowly, to make a change. In the beginning we have to maybe just shut our mouths, go outside, get away from the situation. As we become better we begin to actively just watch the mind, the anger itself arise, abide and subside. Eventually, we can even harness the anger and turn it into energy to do something constructive or even generate warmth and affection. Anger is just energy that we hook on to in a particular way. Taking the hook out allows us to just reform, reshape, transform it. I’m not very good at it myself but I’ve done it once or twice and I’m encouraged.
What impression or thought do you want to leave with people? What do you hope to change?
We can be happier than we presently are. And the key to this happiness is only within you. We have to become our own coach or therapist and that the long term solution must include an understanding of how our mind exists and how it functions. This means understanding reality: How do I exist and how does the world exist? This not just a head trip. It sounds sort of intellectual but, in fact, it is spirituality in the purest sense. At least in my opinion. That is because spirituality, for me, means accessing and opening our potential. And our inner potential is limitless. What we see and know of the world and ourselves, reality, is so limited and erroneous that it leads to a level of happiness that is extremely basic and, ultimately, not satisfying in any way. So, it is not really happiness at all. We deserve better. But it does not just fall upon us from the sky, from God, from a therapist, from Buddha or a guru. It comes from us.
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Editor's Note: This article comes to you as a Special Feature due to its length and scope. It is an excellent and insightful portrayal of Vipassana meditation practice from the Buddhist tradition and one woman's transparent experience with it.
I: The Agony of the Breath
I dread committing gaffes. There—I said it! Until a few years ago, I wasn’t even aware of my fears or of the simmering, underlying dissatisfaction that fueled their existence. A surge of awareness has since developed, helping me become increasingly mindful. Today, I acknowledge and accept failures and limitations as a gallant step toward positive mental health. This is just one example of the many gifts vipassana meditation has given me.
To understand how an ancient meditation technique correlates to an individual’s acceptance of their fears, and in doing so, of transcending dissatisfaction, let’s first understand what vipassana is. Vipassana, a mindfulness technique the Buddha practiced nearly twenty-five hundred years ago, is the process of examining one’s mind through silence, breath, and body awareness. The Buddha advocated the three marks of existence: dukkha, or that dissatisfaction is inherent to life and causes suffering; anicca, or that life’s sufferings are impermanent; and anatta, or that releasing attachment to worldly pleasures and the ego can help an individual release suffering. Vipassana in the ancient Indian language Pali means “to see things as they are.”
In the summer of 2008, I was among a group of nearly 120 people that attended a ten-day, instructor-led vipassana meditation course offered by Spiritual Master S. N. Goenka. The setting couldn’t have been more picturesque: a quaint retreat center in the Sierra Nevada foothills of California. At the time, I lacked even the faintest understanding of just how swiftly this experience would transpire change. The retreat consisted of ten days of breath awareness and meditation, at the rate of ten hours each day. Grueling? You bet! Actually, it was downright brutal. For ten days I spied the vast cosmos of my mind, searching for inner peace and clues to unravel the mind’s myriad mysteries. For ten days I lived like a monk, shunning all luxuries and self-indulgences. Imagine a benign, insipid world of no computers or cell phones, and no texting, reading, writing, praying, listening to music, or watching television. Here’s the granddaddy of all forfeitures—no talking! The only highlights were Goenka’s nightly video sermons and food.
Notwithstanding the sacrifices, my meditation got off to a roaring start. Just waking up at the crack of dawn was energizing. Experiencing nature amid all of its beauty enthralled my senses. Taking a break from my normal life seemed rejuvenating. Goenka introduced retreatants to a technique called anapana, which consists of observing one’s own respiration. Per the instructions, I watched my breath as it traveled in and out of my nose. Outside, all was quiet but for the minor distractions stemming from fellow meditators’ digestive track faux pas, or the air conditioner’s intermittent drone, or the occasional straggler’s muffled strides. The governing diversion was “inner” commotion. At every meditation sitting, my conditioned mind became readily absorbed in thought, reaction, analysis, drama, and fantasy. At this stage, a meditator has two goals: become aware of a spiraling thought, and restore the mind’s focus to the breath. Simple, right? Not really! The primary hurdle is the ability to recognize a wandering mind. Many minutes would drift by before I would realize that the movie playing on my mental monitor, starring me, was headed to Nowhereville. I would shudder back to the present and return to my breath. Then Mental Films would roll out its next production. Again, the minutes would elapse until the next realization and refocus. Needless to say, this happened over and over. The first day in meditation turned out to be more of a game involving constant pursuit, near-captures, and repeated escapes.
In addition, other sources of external distraction, such as physical aches and pains caused by long hours of sitting, the struggle to acclimatize to a new place, the anger and irritation that arose from people’s insensitive behaviors such as checking out early from meditation so they could make a beeline for meals or trading a sit for sleep also took up a good portion of my attention. My conditioned mind judged their conduct with a roll of the eyes, or a bobbing of the head in disbelief, and even an occasional snort and snicker. It took me many hours to let go of the memory of the woman in the dining hall who sneered upon seeing a grimy plate on the buffet table. All she had to do was pick it up and put it for wash. She didn’t; I did. It took even longer to forgive the woman in the neighboring bed whose constant squirting of a nauseating mist interrupted my sleep.
My awareness and my capacity to observe my mind strengthened on the second day, enabling me to follow my breath for longer durations. But it had been two days since I had left home. I missed my family. The lack of social interaction sprouted boredom and restlessness inside of me, which was ironic as I was continually amidst people. The lull of the exterior offered a clear contrast to my mind’s chaos; both drove me crazy. That night, the swell of stimulation I had experienced upon arriving at the retreat deflated to a mere ripple, and I felt physically, mentally, and emotionally fatigued.
The third day unraveled a surprise: my mind’s clamor began to fade into a calmness that I never knew existed. I found myself eating meals slowly, mindfully, pausing between spoonfuls of food, and then chewing and swallowing it with a sense of gratitude. Thoughts still dominated during meditation, but my tranquil mind’s focus had shifted from engaging in melodrama to merely observing thought. It hadn’t come easy, but my mind had finally learned how to disentangle itself from thought’s nomadic ways and ease into the oasis of the present moment. During breaks I found myself contemplating on the art of “being with oneself,” emitting compassionate vibes in response to others’ disruptive behaviors, and making a mental list of potential candidates for this course, among other things. I wasn’t just living like a monk; I was beginning to feel like one too! Although I didn’t grasp it at the time, this exercise in honing patience and concentration helped ground me in the reality that is the now, and would remain as an anchor to help endure all future emotional upheavals.
II: The Anguish of Pain
The three-day rigorous practice of watching my breath prepared me—mind and body—to enter the realm of vipassana. The technique itself is not complicated; it consists of observing the sensations the breath creates. Sensations represent pre-conditioned, mental patterns of the mind. They are a basic form of experience and existence that precede the thought processes, i.e., they exist before the litany of commenting, editing, labeling, qualifying, and judging begins. Per the Buddha, sensations are “karmic” in nature, in that an individual inherits the previous life’s “sensation load” at birth—a congenital disorder of sorts! This defilement “reservoir’s” extent is directly proportional to the past lives’ karma buildup. In the present life, sensory contact with the outside world through the portals of sight, hearing, taste, smell, touch, and thought can activate dormant sensations and/or fashion new ones.
Sensations are also described as “defilements” or the very specific emotions, memories, fears, attitudes, expectations, beliefs, pain, likes, dislikes, and stories that appear repeatedly in our consciousness. When summoned through a mental practice such as vipassana, the sensations manifest on the physical body in a variety of forms: pricking, pinching, itching, goose bumps, tingling, tickling, burning, pulling, tugging, pressure, tightness, heaviness, numbness, dryness, creepy-crawly sensations, pins-and-needles type sensations, pain, heat, chill, and/or sweat. And while these sensations are present at all times throughout the body, the conscious mind can’t detect them because of its lack of focus.
With each breath, as my attention moved throughout my body, from my scalp to my toes, the sensations slowly began to emerge from within. Continued meditation intensified my attention and accelerated my awareness of the arising sensations, which consisted mainly of pain, pressure, heaviness, numbness, pricking, and a few pleasant sensations. Whatever their nature, the sensations arose and passed away. As I learned to observe them, new sensations surfaced and bounced off of the physical landscape of my body. Ongoing mindfulness showed that no single sensation lingered for longer than a few moments. Per the instructions, I directed my attention to what was happening from moment to moment without holding on to what felt good or pushing away what felt bad. The directive was to survey the sensations with perfect calm and objectivity. Thus when sensations surface, and the individual remains nonreactive or nonjudgmental to their emergence, the sensations can make a permanent exit from the individual’s system. Through consistent practice, this “shedding” of sensations “lightens” an individual’s load of defilements, helping change unhealthy attitudes, perceptions, and habits at the deepest, unconscious level.
Goenka’s nightly lectures provided the doctoral dissertation for observing the sensations. It is striking how external, sense perceptions—what we can see, hear, smell, taste, and touch—veer towards, but ultimately elude, a sustained experience of joy and contentment. The human focus rests primarily on externally oriented functions and results in a good part of our lives used up in planning, researching, analyzing, implementing, and decision making on the external plane. The Buddha advocated going past the external plane, beyond the physical form and paying attention to the reality of human life: what can’t be seen by the naked eye, but stimulates the brain; what can’t be touched, but tightens the muscles; what can’t be sniffed, but burns the lungs; what can’t be heard, but throbs in the ears; or what can’t be tasted, but produces a sick dread in the pit of the stomach.
The human resistance, owing to bias, ego gratification or error, to look inward and acknowledge paralyzing thoughts and feelings is self-defeating, and keeps individuals locked up in unhealthy patterns. Sex, alcohol, drugs, food, power, fame, money, work—the list is exhaustive, really. People take refuge in material pursuits, falsely believing that these pursuits will lead to Nirvana. Life becomes a contrived cat-and-mouse game as individuals mindlessly fasten themselves to sights, sounds, tastes, words, motions, or electronic stimuli, chasing after the next job, the next house, or the next spouse/partner, until fatigue or death triumphs. Reacting to situations in the outer environment, the Buddha said, affects the inner environment, spawning two types of sensations: (1) “Craving” sensations generated from reacting to anything that satisfies pleasure. (2) “Loathing” or aversion sensations generated from reacting to pain, both physical and emotional. The human predisposition to react with craving and loathing sets up a vicious cycle of reactions and sensations. The reactions eventually dissipate, but leave behind a residue that reinforces an existing sensation or begets a new one. Either way, the outcome is “suffering”—a life that reinforces addictions, compulsions and emotional dysfunction, and is filled with dissatisfaction, emptiness, stress, anxiety, anger, fear, and other negativities.
A question emerges: how is the Buddha’s ancient, psycho-spiritual doctrine relevant in the digital age? The first revelation that jumps out for a vipassana practitioner is the impermanent nature of the arising bodily sensations. When an individual observes change at the experiential level and sees firsthand how things arise and pass away, they soon begin to associate impermanence on a more conscious plane, in life situations and challenges, an ocean wave-like activity—they come and go. Some of life’s challenges arrive unannounced like earthquakes and tornadoes, and unleash unspeakable horror. Job loss, financial loss, divorce, emotional betrayal, and illness are a few examples. Others, like hurricanes, leave behind a trail of destruction but are more predictable and can be planned for. Ongoing family and marital conflicts are examples. The regular practice of vipassana builds up equanimity, an opportunity to harness pain into something positive, more workable, usable, and sustainable. Loss and change are facts of life, but reactions, negativities, impulsive behaviors, and self-destructive habits don’t have to be. They don’t have to define who we are or how we live life.
Humans are creatures of habit. We hold on to our past, because we think we can go back and fix it. We’re also emotional beings and cling to our fears and insecurities because we are afraid of change. Looking inward helps determine what enslaves us. Learning to let go and moving with the flow of life—disaster and all—is a wonderful shift as it helps break free of the limitations that have held us back, encouraging us to grow, to live meaningful lives. As the veil of inner blindness lifts and we learn to accept the present, cravings transform into love and fears dissolve into faith, ultimately fostering a healthy, balanced, connected life. After all, humans are social creatures. It is binding on us that we maximize that connection and learn to live harmoniously with peace and equanimity. And where we find peace, balance and composure, therein, we find Nirvana!
III: The Harmony of Breath and Pain
When vipassana camp ended, I was more than ready to return home and be with my family, and even more ready to plunge into my normal life with my husband, children, friends and family, and I did so with a renewed sense of spirit. One of my chief concerns during the course had tethered on whether I’d make the transition back into talking and how challenging it would be to get back into the rhythm. The thought surfaced in meditation, especially in the beginning, and I remember wondering if there would be any “side effects,” such as hours of speech training and therapy. And then my mind had switched orbits. What if I’m so taken by silence that I decide to embrace monkhood, trading in my home for a monastery? Imagine, Sister Raji! Oh, my poor family! How are they going to manage my loss? Oh, the mind is so rooted in fears and self-importance! Of course, my concern was completely baseless as I neither ended up in a convent nor have I stopped talking since the course concluded.
Vipassana, the blueprint of a new life, has helped me fashion a world in which I’m able live in sync with my heartfelt longings, without the fear of failure or of being judged. I live life with a keen sense of awareness. I understand that I should stop reaching out for sense gratification, and instead, reach in, within myself, to find the authentic me. The Buddha’s teachings have taught me to focus on my myriad strengths, surround myself with positive people, and tailor my attitude to be more accepting of people and their behaviors. I’m less inclined now to fulfill others’ expectations at my emotional expense. Vipassana has also turned down the volume on my “complain” and “demand” notes. Forever I had experienced anger and frustration because I could never win arguments or dominate conversations like some of my friends and colleagues did. Post vipassana, my “deficiency” has transformed into a skill—a skill that allows me to be a better listener and remain open to others’ points of view, one that has added a whole new dimension to all of my relationships. I now understand that dominance and defiance are the hallmark traits of the ego, not of an individual; that traveling in the fast lane and multitasking are recipes not for effectiveness, but rather dissatisfaction. Making peace with what I cannot change or make go away has been, paradoxically, empowering.
Continued practice enables me to operate in a realm in which I’m truly excited to be myself and I’m energized to serve the greater whole. Awareness of the overwhelming impacts of perfectionism and self-recrimination has resulted in my being kinder to me and less self-critical. What is really great about silence is the simplicity it evokes, the opportunity to observe, absorb and appreciate the miracles in seemingly ordinary things, including bees buzzing as they flit from flower to flower transferring pollen, puffy white clouds that drift away to reveal a blue sky, or sunlight glistening through raindrops to erect a rainbow. I’m also learning to integrate flexibility into my life through the art of prioritizing. Each day now is a celebration of life’s bounty—food, shelter, health, friends, and family.
By profession, I’m an environmental engineer. Years ago I had a sweet government job, owned a house in the suburbs, had a wonderful family, and lived a perfect life by all external accounts. Yet I felt restless, powerless, and driven—if not consumed—by an inability to accept my good life. I always wondered why I was among the few that flourished while millions languished in hunger and poverty. I later traded in my career to become a stay-at-home mother, which, unexpectedly, proved to be a turning point. I became involved in volunteering, a new life experience that allowed me to have a meaningful, positive impact on communities worldwide, and eventually helped channel my distress into gratefulness. I have since stayed active by being involved in my children’s lives and in charitable causes. A privilege that I’m truly grateful for is using my thoughts, words, and action to inspire my children.
Before long, the waves of life washed me over to vipassana’s coast. Looking back at my early years, I now realize that I lived like an iceberg, a drifting existence, a mere flick of the potential that lay obscured below the surface of who I am. Vipassana has helped me tap into that potential, giving form and expression to my creativity. I’m sure glad to still have the house in the suburbs and a wonderful circle of family and friends. I’d like to believe that I write more adroitly now. In addition to responding to my family’s needs and fulfilling my various responsibilities, I am beginning to articulate my own needs, voice my opinions, express my preferences, and nurture my passions like never before. As a youngster I loved to sing. So I enrolled in voice lessons to revive and enjoy the art. I wrote and published a book about my vipassana experience, entitled Inner Pilgrimage: Ten Days to a Mindful Me. Thereafter, I started writing a blog. I maintain my facebook fan page and a website. I’m now a motivational speaker, and fervently talk about my transformation to audiences at various venues. And to think that public speaking had always buckled my knees! My hope in sharing my story is that it’ll inspire others to begin their own journeys of self-discovery, at their own pace, using vipassana.
That said I still experience low days. “Inner” conflicts still hold their grip. Despair, dread, and doubt continue to clutch at me. Anger and frustration over what I can’t change, like when my neighbor overwaters their lawn, still burns my insides. But the equanimity derived from vipassana has made it easier to release irrational fears and negative emotions. Vipassana meditation is helping me reconfigure my life, one fear fragment at a time. To say that these changes happened overnight would be a gross exaggeration. Finding the authentic me is—and will be—a lifelong journey of exploration, trial, and acceptance.
Raji Lukkoor is a mom, author, engineer--trying to live her best life. You can read more about her at www.rajilukkoor.com. You may enjoy her new book, Inner Pilgrimage: 10 Days to a Mindful Me.
Cyndi Dale’s Energetic Boundaries: How to Stay Protected and Connected in Work, Love and Life
A Review by Lisa Erickson
and a Book Giveaway!
Courtesy of the publisher, Sounds True, we are delighted to be able to give away a copy of Energetic Boundaries to one lucky commenter. Leave your thoughts below and you'll be entered into the Giveaway Drawing!
Do you often feel as if you take on other’s emotions? Does being around certain people drain you? Do you find yourself attracting the same kinds of people or situations over and over, although you have tried to change this? Do you frequently experience psychic phenomenon that you can’t explain and don’t know what to do with?
If any of these describe you, Cyndi Dale’s Energetic Boundaries: How to Stay Protected and Connected in Work, Love and Life may be of great help to you, especially if you are open to working on an energetic level. This book offers a comprehensive guide to working with your own energy body using many of the tools energy healers themselves use – color, gemstones, visualizations, and more. Cyndi is herself a renowned author and healer, one I have personally studied and worked with, and I have read most of her books. What I like about all of them – including this one – is that she includes concrete examples from her own life and that of clients (anonymously of course) to show exactly how energy healing works. She also empowers readers to work with themselves energetically, by providing exercises and information for doing so.
In Energetic Boundaries Cyndi begins by offering a little background on the energy principles upon which this book is based, including the three energy body components of the channels (meridians, for those familiar with this term), centers (chakras), and fields (including what’s often called the ‘aura’.) This book is mostly working with the fields, although these are intimately connected to the other two, particularly the chakras. However, you don’t need to be knowledgeable of these components in order to work with this book, although you do need to be open to the idea of them.
Cyndi then outlines 7 of the most common boundary issues, along with how they manifest in an individual’s life. Stuck in repetitive patterns? You may have ‘Paper Doll Syndrome’, in which your boundaries have become rigid, attracting the same people and situations over and over, despite inner work you may have done to shift them. Feel severely drained by certain people in your life? You may have ‘Vampire Syndrome’, in which you feed others energetically with your own energy, rather than insisting they function on their own. Always caring for others to your own detriment? You may be stuck in ‘Healer’s Syndrome’, in which you transmit caring energy out to others, but take in their problems and difficult emotions.
After outlining these 7 common issues, and how they relate to energy boundaries, Cyndi offers exercises for helping you to heal these issues. These include guidance on how to uncover old storylines in your life that might have helped create and perpetuate boundary issues, and steps for releasing old intentions and creating new ones. Visualizations working with color are included for helping you to focus in on strengthening particular chakras and their corresponding boundaries. Also included are suggestions for working with crystals, gemstones, metals, symbols and numbers that are associated with strengthening your various energy fields.
This information is presented within chapters focused on health, work, finances, and love, as our energy boundaries are our interface mode in every area of our daily lives. My favorite chapter was actually the final one on parenting, which outlines boundary issues that contemporary children tend to have (based on the different energy ‘types’ of children being born today) along with suggestions for working with each type of child to help them strengthen their boundaries.
Working with the material in this book does require being open to energy studies, and trusting in both your own intuition and your ability to self-heal. Nothing in this book is a meant to replace medical care or therapeutic counseling, but it may be a great complement to work you are doing in those areas, or the ‘missing piece’ for completing that work on yourself.
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You can learn about Cindi Dale's new book by visiting SoundsTrue.com. You can read an excerpt from the book here.
Learn more about Cindy Dale and her good work in the world by visiting her website:http://cyndidale.com/
Remember to leave a comment to be entered into the Giveaway Drawing for Energetic Boundaries!
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