From the Editor, Jan Lundy


Sniffing Out Gratitude







I love how life works.

Very often, at the precise moment when we need it, something arrives to buoy our flagging spirits. This happened to me this week, and it had everything to do with our theme for Buddha Chick Life this month, “Gratitude and Appreciation.”

I was feeling like a petulant child. Admittedly, I was pouting a bit. Life wasn’t going quite as I’d hoped. In Buddhist terms, I was stuck in resistance: not particularly liking what was unfolding in my life and lacking the emotional energy to deal with it in a sage manner.

At times like these, we become our own worst enemy because our oh, so wily mind has become fixated on what’s wrong, not to our liking, or making us uncomfortable. The mind whines, “But, I don’t like this.” “I didn’t ask for this.”

Enter Lisa Erickson, one of our gifted writers here at BCL. She’d sent me her November article, “The Energetics of Gratitude: A Chakra Practice.” As I read her words, the light went on and I remembered (spiritual amnesia be gone!) how potent a force gratitude can be for shifting our energy—and all that self-absorbed ruminating! I vowed in that very moment to renew a long-neglected, daily gratitude practice and allow it to lead me back to center.

Years ago, when I’d lost that center, primarily due to the stress of a failing marriage, I discovered gratitude as a spiritual practice. By making the very simple effort of writing down 5 things I was grateful for in the morning and 5 more at night before bed, I transformed my life. No kidding.

Each day I found myself sniffing out gratitude. Really listening, looking for the little things that were “right” in my life and grabbing onto those small glimmers of gratitude, holding them to my heart as a healing balm. I became like a hunting dog on the trail of a sleek red fox, pointing my nose toward what was good and true. 21 days later, I was a different person.

I’m ready to be a different person again. I’m ready for gratitude to be the first thing on my mind when I awake, lying in bed next to my wonderful husband. I’m eager to recite a litany of appreciations as I rise and begin my morning. These are this morning's Grateful 5:

Hot tea to drink.

A refrigerator with food in it.

A warm and cozy house.

Meaningful work to do.

Friends and family easily reached via the internet or telephone.

As I thought of each of these things,  I could feel my vibration rising up, swelling, lifting me out of early morning darkness. Any of us can do the same. Gratitude practice shifts how we experience the world.

Our writers this month offer their own insights into how we can incline our minds and hearts toward gratitude. Like me, you might want to begin with Lisa’s “Gratitude Chakra Practice” to make that shift. Or, 

Cindy Hively invites us to partake in “A Serving of Spiritual Gratitude.”

Kaveri Patel offers a powerful gratitude practice using e-mail in “Thank You.”

Beth Dargis shares her life-altering journey through loss—a loss so powerful it is hard for any of us to imagine—via the path of gratitude in “Strength, Grief and Gratitude.”

Jennifer Niedzielski transforms the challenges of motherhood with “Strike a Pose of Gratitude, Mama!”

Laura Hegfield offers prose and a photo that stirs are hearts to be “Solely Grateful.”

And more.

I hope you will join me this month in launching your own gratitude practice or jumpstarting an old one. Indeed, in difficult times, especially in the aftermath of Hurricane Sandy, it is wise for us to keep our noses to the gratitude trail. Goodness abounds even amidst the trials of everyday life. 


Namaste',

Jan Lundy, Editor



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Strength, Grief and Gratitude


Beth Dargis


I was on retreat in late 2009. The word strength kept coming to me. In a way that made me feel I needed to be strong for something bad that was going to happen. Though I didn’t know what the something bad was, I took the word seriously. I used the Strength as my theme for 2010 where I strengthened in many different ways: exercised more, tried out various ways of dealing with emotions, prayed daily and turned my sometimes gratitude practice into a morning and evening practice.

Every morning I would type out in my journal program what I was thankful for and what I was looking forward to this day. Nature, things I was inspired by, family and friends topped my list often. In the evening I would journal about the day. Authentic words, bad and good, to get all that emotion out so I could sleep at night. Then I typed out lessons learned, successes, people I met, things I loved in that day. Gratitude guided my way to peaceful sleep.

Early 2011, the police came to my door. There had been a homicide. My 18 year old son was the victim. I was numb through most of the funeral and for weeks afterward. But, then my journal called to me again. I knew I did not want to get stuck in sadness and anger. And I also didn’t want to squash my grief.

In the mornings I added writing about my grief,  listening to music that moved me or art journaling if I felt like grieving. At the end I would come back to my gratitude practice. Since I had been doing it over a year regularly, I was able to use my practice when I needed it most. I was in the habit of seeing the good. I could write about a friend doing my dishes, the great blue heron that started showing up in the nearby wetlands we walk, cherry pie someone brought over, or a talk with a friend. I could write about good memories and the kindness of strangers.

During the murder trial, I could write about being happy: that our phone number was unlisted, that my sister took care of the details when family came to town, that my husband was there to hold my hand. It was still not an easy time, but gratitude gave me strength to sit in the court room. It gave me strength to go down into the depths of sadness and grief, knowing I could bring myself out. And it connects me to my son who was smiles and light.

I still write out my gratitudes every morning and sometimes journal my gratitudes before bed. I am seeing more and more light. Tragedy changes you, but it doesn’t have to snuff out the light in your life.


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(Photo Credit: Mara Friedman, "Teach Me to Fly")

Beth is living the simpler life in West Michigan. She helps the overwhelmed create saner, simpler lives. She delivers...

Untamed possibility. Breathe easier simplicity. Hope.
On the wings of understanding and encouragement.
Step by step breaking down from “no way! “ to “why not?”

She loves giving hope to people that come to her thinking it can’t be done. She was not born organized and had to learn the skills. Things like overcoming perfectionism and procrastination. And knowing what is for dinner before 5pm. You can get more tips at her blog and also get the free Declutter Calendar that breaks down decluttering into small, simple steps: http://www.mysimplerlife.com/blog

The Energetics of Gratitude – A Chakra Practice

Lisa Erickson









“Some people grumble that roses have thorns; I am grateful that thorns have roses.” – Alphonse Karr


It never ceases to amaze me how much a few minutes of gratitude practice can change our state of awareness. It is such a simple thing – to stop and express gratitude for that which we have in our life – and yet it can be difficult to make the time to do it. I feel this is because it often goes against the grain of the messages and vibration we are experiencing and absorbing from all around us.

We are surrounded by messages and energies that support grumbling about thorns (to reference the quote above!) We are conditioned to see what is wrong, to judge, and to criticize. And that can be OK, because it is a step in fixing problems, in our life and the world. But our thoughts and emotions are energy, and when we are stuck in a pattern of seeing only what is wrong, we emanate that out into the world. Our thoughts have momentum, and when we repeatedly focus on what is wrong, on what is lacking, it can become more and more difficult to see what is right.

Shifting this energy is really what gratitude practice is about for me. I don’t view it as  a ‘moral’ practice – it’s not about expressing gratitude because I should. Instead, it’s about counteracting the energy of judgment and criticism that we are so often bombarded by, so that within my own mind and being, I can shift my state of awareness into a different place, a different vibration – an open, abundant, appreciative, and giving place.

Because I work with the chakras, I sometimes like to do this by focusing on each of the main 7 in-body chakras in turn, and expressing gratitude for the related area of my life. You can use the guide below to give this a try. As you do this practice, try to cultivate an energy, a shift in your awareness and vibration. For some people, verbalizing thanks is effective for accomplishing this. For others, it might involve visualizing that which you are grateful for, or perhaps some other ‘trigger’ resonates for you. The important thing to remember is that gratitude energetics practice is about feeling grateful – not about robotically reciting a list of thanks.

Chakra Gratitude Practice

Center yourself and take a few deep breaths to tune-in.

Root Chakra Gratitude: Our root or first chakra is associated with our home, ancestry, connection to nature, and physical body (among other things.) While focusing on your tail bone, select one or more things you are grateful for from these areas of your life, and either verbally express your thanks, or visualize and feel your gratitude. Even if one of these areas is problematic for you, find one thing related to it to focus your gratitude upon. Perhaps you have little time to connect to nature and this bothers you; think of that one plant you own and love, or that one beautiful tree you often notice on your way to work, or the warmth of the sun on your face as you walk to your car, and direct gratitude towards this.

Sacral Chakra Gratitude: Our sacral or second chakra relates to our emotions, sensuality, creativity, and sexuality. Many chakra teachers also associate it with abundance, although I consider abundance related to all of our chakras, but you can focus on it here if you like. While focusing on your lower pelvis area, find one or more things to feel grateful for from these areas of your life. Perhaps it is as simple as feeling grateful for your favorite sweater, which you love the feel of against your skin (sensual.) Or perhaps you are grateful for a creative outlet you have in your life, or something you have created yourself.

Navel Chakra Gratitude: Our navel or third chakra relates to our personal power, will, boundaries, and ability to execute plans. What have you accomplished that you are grateful for? What activities in your life enhance your personal power and sense of will? Be grateful for them now, while focusing just below your navel.

Heart Chakra Gratitude: Our fourth or heart chakra relates to our ability to love and be loved, in all of our relationships. Here is where you can really feel your gratitude for your loved ones and those who support you, while focusing on your heart chakra in your chest.

Throat Chakra Gratitude: Our fifth or throat chakra relates to our ability to express ourselves in all forms. How do you express yourself? What was a recent situation in which you successfully did so? Feel gratitude for this ability or moment, while focusing on your throat.

Third Eye Gratitude: Our sixth or third eye chakra relates to our intuition and wisdom. When has your intuition aided you recently? When has your wisdom? Express your gratitude for this now, while focusing on the midpoint just above your brow.

Crown Chakra Gratitude: Our crown or seventh chakra relates to our spiritual connection and experiences. When have you felt grace in your life? What spiritual beliefs, teachings, communities, or teachers have blessed your life? Feel your gratitude now, while focusing on your crown.

Hopefully at this point you feel positively alive with appreciation. Note the energetic shifts that have occurred while you did this practice. Can you feel how your mood, state of awareness, and even your body have shifted? Your energetic vibration has shifted too, and this is now what you are emanating outward. And everyone around you will appreciate you for it!

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Lisa is a meditation teacher, energy worker, writer, and mom to three. She loves helping people heal and explore the unseen aspects of themselves through chakra (energy center) meditation and related energy body work. She specializes in women's energetics - the distinct characteristics and phases of women's subtle bodies, and the special spiritual doorways available to women through their feminine divinity. In her work she draws on many diverse traditions, including Vajrayana Buddhism, Tantra, Zen, gnostic Christianity, shamanism, yoga, astrology, and several energy healing systems, most particularly the work of Cyndi Dale. She writes on all these subjects at her blog Mommy Mystic (http://www.MommyMystic.com), as well as writing regularly on Buddhism for Bellaonline (http://buddhism.bellaonline.com/Site.asp), where she is the Buddhism site editor. She offers classes, workshops and personal sessions through The Maat Institute (http://www.themaatinstitute.com.) Lisa's column here is entitled, "Women's Energetics."

Strike a Pose of Gratitude, Mama!

Jennifer Niedzielski







A Balancing Act

It was early morning, the lights in the yoga room were at a soft glow, and the temperature was hovering around 95 degrees. Sweat was rolling down my face as I wobbled to find my balance in a challenging pose. As I zoned in on my drishti, my focal point, my mind settled, my foot rooted into the ground, and I stood still. Sure, it was only a mere 3 seconds before I started to wobble again, but for that moment in time, I experienced effortless balance.

There are many areas of my mothering where I still wobble…a lot. All of us have different life poses that challenge us. As moms, we can effortlessly balance our checkbooks, our kids on our hips, the family meals, and the crazy daily schedules, but there tends to be one area where I, and many other moms, still wobble like crazy; balancing all our giving energy with equal parts receiving energy. We give a lot more than we allow ourselves to receive.

This is a challenging pose, right? As women, we are natural givers and nurtures. Especially as mothers, we have an authentic desire to give and take care of our loved ones. These are wonderfully divine, selfless acts-- when we feel good doing them. But if we are not aware of the delicate balance between giving and receiving, our giving can serve to deplete us, rather than fill us up. Without balance of these two energies, our giving can become infused with palpable resentment and anger.

Now, I know what you are thinking. I’ve thought it, too. It’s impossible to find an equal balance between giving and receiving, especially as a mother. I mean, isn’t it obvious? On a daily basis, there is simply too much to do, too much to give to find time to receive. We might even psych ourselves out more when our subconscious mind tells us that receiving is selfish. It’s okay. Just notice. Just notice when doubt creeps into your head. It’s natural. In fact, I hate to admit this, but I do it in yoga more than I should. I’ll glance over and see someone doing a pose where their body is contorted in a way that doesn’t seem at all right or realistic, and I think, “That’s impossible. I’ll never be able to get into that pose!” But…but…someone is doing it! If someone can do it, then it is possible. Same holds true with balancing all your giving with as much (yes, as much) receiving. It is possible. The practice, the pose, to get into is gratitude.

Striking a Pose

Gratitude is a perfectly balanced practice. When you focus your attention on giving thanks, you open yourself up to receiving the positive energy that flows from the act of gratitude. When you give thanks for anything in your life, you immediately receive positive energy back. Better yet, when you give thanks, you receive a new, positive perspective!

Giving thanks immediately shifts your focus from what’s not working in your life to what is. You shift from focusing on lack to the abundance that surrounds you. When all you see is abundance in your life, your heart receives good vibrations. You experience a deep sensation of your heart opening, softening, and growing in size.

When our giving and receiving energies are balanced, we experience not only a shift in our perspective but a shift in our mothering. When our hearts are full of positive energy, we are better able to do what we do best: give compassion, care, acceptance, and respect through our doing. We find great strength in being gentle with our kids when they are expressing strong emotions, we find awesome power in not emotionally reacting to situations we can’t control, and we find unshakable peace in allowing people and situations to be exactly as they are.

Gratitude is a posture, a mental pose. It’s an attitude, a way of seeing and being. So as you go about your day, giving love, energy, and attention through all your doing, seize many moments to give thanks for the abundance that surrounds you. What you receive from the act of gratitude will not only allow you to give more, your giving will be immeasurably infused with palpable love, grace, and acceptance.    


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A Serving of Spiritual Gratitude


Cindy Harpe-Hively







I am writing this column as I look outside my window into my back yard forest. The trees are high and you can see the openness and natural beauty. I have requested of my husband to not disturb these three acres and let nature "just be." Let the leaves fall where they may, let the sticks be, let the seeds that have been cultivated all alone over summer continue their cycle. What a beautiful time of the year and this year seems to be brighter and happier than ever. Isn't it amazing the way Mother Earth takes care of us? During the autumn, our eyes are filled with so many different colors of leaves, fruits and vegetables. This is one of my favorite times of the year when I prepare meals combine the colors of the season and the thoughts of Thanksgiving.

One of my everyday "good To Do's" is to take time each day just to be grateful for Mother Earth by sending her appreciation as I walk, the crunch of leaves beneath my feet, the velvet feel of thick moss, the sound of the creek as it rushes after a rain, and the large variety of harvest that she provides for the beauty of wildlife. By choosing consciously to honor and thank the Earth for all the well-being she provides, we are treating her not only with respect but also with thankfulness and gratitude. Bringing awareness to gratitude has taught me a spiritual lesson and how important it is to cultivate the simple "essence of gratitude." The word gratitude seems to be used so much in our present day. Gratitude has even become a hot research topic by many practitioners of all sorts. We hear, see, write, read so much about gratitude that I worry that it will become just another buzz word. That is why cultivating the "essence of gratitude" is so important in our EVERY DAY life.

Cultivating an “essence of gratitude” has been linked to better health, sound sleep, less anxiety and depression, higher satisfaction with life and kinder behavior toward our self and others. It is part of our psychological system that causes us to raise our frequency about how much value we hold in the awareness of our own emotional being and in the eyes of others. Gratitude is what happens when someone does something that causes you to realize that you matter more to that person than you thought you did. It is that feeling deep down that triggers an immediate awakening in the present moment that sends goose bumps, chills, the warm fuzzys and weakness in your knees.

As a culture we may have lost a great sense of gratefulness. We are taught instant gratification is what makes us happy, things going like we plan them to, never to settle for anything less than the best; working harder will make you a better person and lots of money in the bank means an "attitude of gratitude." It saddens me to even think anyone would have this distorted thought of being thankful and living with gratitude. But, I know many people who do think and live this way. We have stopped for a moment to encounter each other, to meet, to love, to share. In this present time of our world this is a precious opportunity for us to spiritually awaken. It is a little parenthesis in eternity. If we share caring, lightheartedness, and love, we will create abundance and joy for each other. And then this moment will be worthwhile and based on the "essence of gratitude."

A good way to enhance this mind-set is to spend some quiet time focusing on gratitude. Write down your thoughts in a journal, look for opportunities and celebrate your blessings. By affirming the blessings in your life, you will feel more energized and happy and naturally want to share this joy with others. We can make a powerful difference in the world by fostering a sense of deep gratitude and joy in our hearts. Gratitude is a powerful tool that can transform our lives. Focusing our thoughts on gratitude for our spiritual well being and growth makes us feel energized and motivated to make a difference in the world. When we reach out to others in an effort to touch their lives in the same positive ways that we've been touched, we inevitably attract even more essence into our lives. We end up creating a powerful cycle of love and gratitude that benefits all of us. By counting your spiritual essence from a place of gratitude and sharing your joy with others, you can create a positive difference in the lives of those around you.

When you cultivate the "essence of gratitude," meaning the spiritual soul of the word gratitude—the highest level of awareness of being grateful in every cell, every molecule, and every fiber of your being—you awaken to life as you never have before. When we fully accept to dive into this energy and welcome it in our daily lives, we awaken to something greater than us; we transform the quality of our lives and we live our life to the fullest, in harmony with our Higher Self while fulfilling our journey and destiny with joy and passion!


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Thank You

Kaveri Patel





Thank You

sometimes it’s the

simplest things in life

two words spoken

droplets of rain

in a drought

of longing

 parched hearts

shriveled and old

beating with new life

the possibility of

gratitude

saving lives

It’s easy to be grateful when things are going your way.  But what do you do when things are less than ideal- when illness strikes, a job is threatened, or a valued relationship ends?  Is it still possible to give thanks?

A few months ago, a dear friend and I began to exchange gratitude emails.  Each day we listed five things for which we were grateful.  On difficult days it was hard to come up with five things.  It felt like my gratitude antennae wasn’t strong enough to detect signals of abundance and joy.  Sometimes I even wondered if it was broken!

On these days, I tried to keep it simple.  Nothing spectacular was needed to be thankful for basic things: the caress of warm water against my skin, vision to appreciate a crisp, clear autumn sunrise, two arms to embrace the ones I love. 

Now I look forward to sending and receiving gratitude emails.  It’s as if my heart is beating with new life, the blood of appreciation though it feels more normal and natural to complain.  Author, therapist, and researcher Dr. Rick Hanson says, “Your brain evolved a negativity bias that makes it like Velcro for negative experiences but Teflon for positive ones.”

The practice of giving thanks takes time.  Like any behavior change, it is important to set an intention.  We can check in with this intention as often as we need to.  Like an encouraging parent, teacher, coach, or spiritual guide, our intention reminds us of what is most important.  It doesn’t care how long it takes us or how far we stray from our desired path.  It can be that soft whisper in the dawn hours reminding us that today is a new day, another chance to begin again.

May this season inspire you to give thanks for all the blessings in your life.  May the possibility of gratitude save lives.


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Kaveri has been on a quest to find answers, not through religious texts, any particular person or popular dogma,but through her own experiences. She lives with her wonderful family in northern California where she practices medicine, meditation, parenting, yoga, writing, and patience. Kaveri's column here focuses on "Living Poetry."  To find out more about Kaveri and her books/poems, please visit www.wisdominwaves.com.

Laura is a lover of life with an artist’s soul, living on the edge of the woods in New Hampshire, USA. No longer able to work outside her home as a teacher due to Multiple Sclerosis, she stays engaged with the world, sharing her poetry, prose, essays, photography and a meditation tele-circle with podcasts on her blog, Shine the Divine: Creativity IS a Spiritual Practice. She also offers private Spiritual Direction, Creativity Coaching and Lev b'Lev SoulCollage® through her website, www.shinethedivine.com. Several of Laura's poem's will be included in a soon to be released anthology titled Beyond the Dark Room. Her work focuses on the strength and beauty found in fragility, recognizing that the words “broken” and “whole” are not in conflict. Laura emphasizes gratitude for ordinary sacred moments continuously revealed through the eyes of her heart.

Laura is a lover of life with an artist’s soul, living on the edge of the woods in New Hampshire, USA. No longer able to work outside her home as a teacher due to Multiple Sclerosis, she stays engaged with the world, sharing her poetry, prose, essays, photography and a meditation tele-circle with podcasts on her blog, Shine the Divine: Creativity IS a Spiritual Practice. She also offers private Spiritual Direction, Creativity Coaching and Lev b'Lev SoulCollage® through her website, www.shinethedivine.com. Several of Laura's poem's will be included in a soon to be released anthology titled Beyond the Dark Room. Her work focuses on the strength and beauty found in fragility, recognizing that the words “broken” and “whole” are not in conflict. Laura emphasizes gratitude for ordinary sacred moments continuously revealed through the eyes of her heart.

Danielle, in her own words: I am a young woman seeking out ways to help and heal my life.  I am releasing my fears and worries to enlighten and lift my being in order to better myself, my children and the world around me.  I am learning to be responsible for my energy and my contribution.  I live in tiny town in the middle of Illinois on 2 beautiful sandy lakes surrounded by family.  I have 14 beautiful healthy nieces and nephews and 2 amazingly bright children that help me to live life on the silly side.  Children are so pure and free to be.  They inspire me to let loose and live optimistically. Danielle writes the column "Buddha Babies."