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Mothering in the Moment:
Lessons on Mothering Learned from Mother Nature

by Jennifer Niedzielski








Mother Nature’s Life Lessons

As mothers, we have a profound teacher on the art of mothering available to us at all times. That teacher is Mother Nature. She has so much to teach us if we are ready and willing to listen. There is one lesson she has been waiting for me to learn for a very long time-- the Law of Least Effort. Now that I am a mother, it’s become essential that I learn it!

The Law of Least Effort is one of the Seven Spiritual Laws of Success by Deepak Chopra. “Do less and accomplish more,” is its mantra. Now, I've just got to say, this is so not intuitive to me. I am (err-- was) the type of person who believes that struggle, stress, and strain are essential for doing anything of importance well. Thus, I pursed mothering with the same rigor I did everything else in life; I was hard on myself, demanded perfection, worked tirelessly without breaks, and sought control of every situation.

But my theory wasn’t effective in mothering (nor in life, I’m finally able to see). The harder I pushed myself in my mothering, the harder it pushed right back. I was constantly overwhelmed and stressed. I was anxious. I fell prey to perfectionist thinking. I was angry, tired, and reactive-- all the time! That’s when I started to realize that stress, strain, and working really, really hard to be successful was actually counter-productive. Perhaps there was something to the idea of doing less to accomplish more. What did I have to lose in testing it out?

The Effortless Ease of Mother Nature

The Law of Least Effort reminds us that Mother Nature’s intelligence functions with effortless ease and grace. There is no resistance. “Grass doesn’t try to grow, it just grows…Flowers don’t try to bloom, they bloom…Birds don’t try to fly, they fly” (Chopra). In essence, the Law of Least Effort is all about just “being.” It’s all about letting go, accepting the present moment, and not thinking so darn much.

To really grasp this concept of doing less, consider how a flower grows. It doesn’t stress or strain in order to “accomplish” its true nature and beauty. It simply does exactly what it is destined to do without expending any more effort or energy than absolutely necessary. It doesn’t think, “I wonder if I’m doing this right. Am I growing fast enough? Am I as pretty as the other flowers around me? Perhaps I should try to be tulip and not a rose. I really got to get going here. I better hurry up!”

Silly example, I know. But when I consider how everything in nature displays this effortless ease and grace (sans thought), I begin to realize just how much our thinking is our primary problem. As I see it, struggle, strife, and stress all come into play as a result of our “extra” thoughts about the thing we are doing, not the doing of the thing itself. Yes, we are intelligent human beings blessed with the ability to think, but we are also infinitely intelligent human beings blessed with the ability to control our thinking so to access the sacred space of non-thinking whenever we wish.

Mindful Mothering

The principle of the Law of Least Effort and doing less to accomplish more might not initially seem realistic in mothering. More times than not, we feel we have to expend as much effort as possible to accomplish the countless things that must be done every single day. There is no denying that mothering is, at times, chaotic, challenging, and all-consuming.

But what would happen if we thought “less” in these moments? What would happen if we didn’t mentally judge these moments as stressful, bad, boring, or unacceptable? What would happen if we intentionally breathed in and out in the situations that stressed us out and focused our attention on our breath and not on our negative thoughts?

I know what happens. I’ve experienced it. I mother from a sacred place. Every time I surrender to all the mothering moments in my life by releasing my judgment of them (e.g., doing less thinking), I accomplish peace of mind. When I accomplish peace of mind, I tap into my infinite font of pure love. When I mother from this place, I respond to my children and all my mothering moments with effortless grace and ease-- just like Mother Nature intended.

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Photo Credit: David Castillo

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Jennifer Niedzielski is a teacher, writer, mother of three young daughters, and the co-founder of Mindful Moms Network™. After teaching in the traditional classroom setting for over 12 years, she is transcending classroom walls to inspire and teach women how to reclaim their calm and take exquisite care of their mind, body, and inner-selves amidst the chaos of mothering. Through Mindful Moms, it is her intention to create a nurturing and supportive community for moms that encourages Inward Development through the Art of Mothering.

To find out more about how to be a mindful mama, please visit Mindful Moms Network™ Facebook page:
http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1275432069#!/MindfulMoms

and Mindful Moms Network™ blog, Intentionally Inspiring Mamas:
http://www.intentionallyinspiringmamas.com/

 


Comments

Coleen
05/01/2012 7:59am

Jennifer,

This article really struck a chord within me. I had just started writing all the things I have to do today and fretting about how I already have a days work outlined and all the things that won't get done today as a result and yada yada yada. Your article has shown me a completely different state of mind. I will be printing this out and referring to it often!

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05/01/2012 12:44pm

I love your expressions here of Mother Nature's Law of Least Effort! Beautiful.

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amy
05/02/2012 2:59pm

this is exactly what I needed to read! Thank you

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05/02/2012 3:01pm

I can so relate to this, I had to learn these same lessons. It took having 3 kids in 19 months (yes there were twins in there) to finally get me to surrender! I had no choice but to stop struggling and let things flow. Such a great gift really...

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Kaveri
05/03/2012 11:33am

Jennifer, I thought the rose that wanted to be a tulip was fabulous. Not silly at all.

My daughter often says, "Breathe in a flower and blow out a candle Mom!". I often ask her to remind me of this, Little Buddha that she is, when I'm lost in thought.

Thank you for the gentle reminder that sometimes less is more.

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Linda
05/05/2012 11:50am

Jennifer, such a gracious & lovely expression here.
This lends new understanding to the phrase, "Consider the lilies of the field." I'm grateful.

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Danielle Atherton-Rutledge
05/08/2012 7:16am

So much truth here. I resonate with every word. I too was a reactor rather than a be-er. I have struggled with that my whole life. Less thinking, for me, is always a good thing! Breathe more think less. Yes, yes, yes. Perfect. Love.

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